that reads as follows;
public street or highway.
It shall be unlawful for any person to permit any animal or fowl owned by him or in his
custody or under his control to run at large upon, or to graze alongside, any public street
or highway, whether such street or highway be enclosed by fence or not.
Who is in control of deer? Who is in control of rabbits? Who is in control of fox? Ultimately, deer, rabbits, fox and other wild game fall under the control of the Governor of the state. With this being the case, we see deer, rabbits, and other wild game grazing along the roadside all the time. For that matter, the same goes for all kinds of birds that fall under fowl as listed above. That would mean that the Governor of the state of Virginia is in violation of Gloucester County Animal Control Ordinance 3-4 as defined above. Are local leaders going to charge the Governor with these violations? To do so would be suicide for the officials of this county. To not do so is a conflict of interest. If there is a conflict of interest in the ordinance, how can it possibly be enforceable?
Wait, it gets even worse. Under Gloucester County Animal Control Ordinance 3-16, the Governor of Virginia has even more problems. Let's take a look at that shall we?
Sec. 3-16. Allowing animals to defecate on public property or on private property of
It shall be unlawful for any owner or person in control of any animal to allow any animal
to defecate on the property of other persons without their consent or that of the
authorized agent or person having control of the premises or on public property.
Immediate removal and sanitary disposal of the defecated matter shall not constitute a
violation of this section. The defecated matter shall be placed in a container and
disposed of in a proper waste receptacle.
The Governor has deer, rabbits, fox, fowl and all kinds of animals defecating on both public and private property all over the county. Who is cleaning that up? No one. Who is responsible for cleaning it up? According to the county, the Governor's office. Is the Governor's office cleaning any of this up? No. Why not? Because it is not an enforceable ordinance? Is anyone being charged with violations to either of these? Has anyone consented to having deer defecate on their property? We have not.
So if you park your vehicle in Gloucester County and birds defecate on it, do you call Animal Control and register a complaint and have them come out and wash your car on behalf of the Governor's office so that the county does not have to charge the Governor with violations to the ordinance? I would say yes to that. In fact, that is probably the best use for Animal Control. Defecation duty. Put Animal Control officers to work going around the county cleaning up all the defecation from the Governor's animals to keep the Governor's office in compliance with the local ordinances. It's a crappy job but someone has to do it.
It's also a great way to grow the Animal Control positions in this county. There is so much crap all over the county and we need it all cleaned up. Animal Control can set up multiple car wash stations so anyone who has had their vehicle crapped on by any of the birds in the county, can get a free car wash. Get your shoes cleaned for free if you step in crap that is not from one of your own animals. If a bird takes a dump on you, call Animal Control and register a complaint and get your cloths cleaned for free. Otherwise the county has to charge the Governor's office with violations to the county ordinance, right? Wait, according to the ordinances above, Animal Control has to remove the defecation and dispose of it in a sanitary way. They would not just be able to wash away the defecation. Sorry about their bad luck on how they have to clean the crap up. Was anyone thinking when these ordinances were being written? We didn't think so either.
As usual, we are not attorney's and this does not constitute legal advice. Only an attorney can legally advice you. We are just questioning everything as usual and laughing our heads off at the same time.
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